While you might recognize him as the grooming guy on Bravo's "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy," Kyan Douglas showed he's more than just a pretty face with the secrets to near-perfect hair and skin when he spoke March 14 in the Mundelein Center Auditorium.
Rainbow Connection and the Student Activity Fund sponsored Douglas' 90-minute speech. A graduate of Loyola University New Orleans, Douglas spoke about several aspects of his life, including coming out to his friends and family and being a member of the hit show's "Fab 5" and the gay community.
Douglas said he knew from an early age that he was different from the other boys. Although he wasn't aware of his sexuality at the time, Douglas recalls an incident when he was 7 or 8 years old that gave him proof of his uniqueness.
"I saw this older guy with this Sean Cassidy wavy hairstyle," Douglas said. "I wanted his hair because his hair was cool and my bowl-cut hair was not cool. I think what it was, his confidence [and] self expression, and he looked very comfortable in his skin. I knew that I wanted to be more like that because I knew that I was not comfortable in my skin."
As part of a Catholic family living in Tallahassee, Fla., Douglas described his teenage self as average and nothing particularly special. Douglas denied his homosexuality throughout high school. He even dated girls.
"I think back to that time now, and I really don't know how I did it," Douglas said. "Because I am so gay. It's one of those things that you shouldn't suppress."
After high school, Douglas moved to Texas with a friend. There he met a woman who practiced the art of healing, which sparked his interest in massage therapy.
Soon after, at the age of 20, he came out to his family. Douglas first came out to his grandmother at a restaurant. He confessed that he was dating the waiter who was serving them. She was happy for him and supported him. After her reaction, Douglas decided to come out to his parents.
"My parents accepting me was them giving me permission to be who I was," Douglas said.
In addition to massage therapy, Douglas focused on his spiritual journey. During his years in college, Douglas befriended and went on retreats with some of the Jesuit fathers. He used these experiences to discover who he was and to explore the healing arts.
"We all have our paths in life we are supposed to follow to find who we are supposed to be, but it's not always a straight path," Douglas said.
After graduating from LUNO, he moved to New York City to promote hair care products for Aveda. Originally working on the sales floor, Douglas was promoted in the company and eventually helped open the Aveda Institute in New York. He then enrolled in the very school he helped form.
After graduation, Douglas worked at the Arrojo Studio as a colorist where one of the studio's clients recommended him for the casting call for "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy." Since portraying himself on television was something Douglas always had wanted to do, he accepted the offer to be on the show and took the opportunity to, as Douglas put it, "make something of my life." He believes the program portrays the Fab 5 as five normal guys who just happen to be gay.
Since then, Douglas said he cannot seem to find time to do little things like laundry and food shopping. Each hour-long episode of "Queer Eye" requires a four-day shoot.
On the first day, the Fab 5 surprise the victim they will be making over and decide what needs to be done to set the poor, misguided straight man on his path to success. The second day, the Fab 5 go shopping and groom him. On the third day, they go back to the newly furnished apartment and do the final preparations for the big event that night. The fourth and final day, they film the final sequence that appears at the end of each episode.
Although "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" is a huge success, there are still some who do not support the show. Douglas believes their criticism makes his convictions stronger.
"I don't ever apologize for who I am because then I let someone else decide who I am," Douglas said.
In a question-and-answer period following the speech, Douglas addressed some of the issues concerning the gay community especially with regards to gay marriage. He said he thinks that people are against gay marriage because they are fearful of it.
"It is a part of human nature to fear what is different," Douglas said. "Most parents think that if their son is gay, then he will have AIDS and die alone."
Douglas also said that, if not legally, someday he will be married in spirit.
Douglas said he believes anything can be accomplished as long as one trusts oneself.
"There is something inside of us that guides us, and if you are quiet and listen to it, you'll be all right," Douglas said.
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